It’s too much!

A Reflection for Monday, February 23 by Rev. Kelly Johnston

Lectionary reading for 2/23/2025: Psalm 32; 1 Kings 19:1-8; Hebrews 2:10-18

Selected passage for reflection: 1 Kings 19:1-8 

Read

1 Kings 19:1-8 NIV

Now Ahab told Jezebel everything Elijah had done and how he had killed all the prophets with the sword. 2 So Jezebel sent a messenger to Elijah to say, “May the gods deal with me, be it ever so severely, if by this time tomorrow I do not make your life like that of one of them.”

3 Elijah was afraid and ran for his life. When he came to Beersheba in Judah, he left his servant there, 4 while he himself went a day’s journey into the wilderness. He came to a broom bush, sat down under it and prayed that he might die. “I have had enough, Lord,” he said. “Take my life; I am no better than my ancestors.” 5 Then he lay down under the bush and fell asleep.

All at once an angel touched him and said, “Get up and eat.” 6 He looked around, and there by his head was some bread baked over hot coals, and a jar of water. He ate and drank and then lay down again.

7 The angel of the Lord came back a second time and touched him and said, “Get up and eat, for the journey is too much for you.” 8 So he got up and ate and drank. Strengthened by that food, he traveled forty days and forty nights until he reached Horeb, the mountain of God.

Elijah in the Desert is an oil on panel painting by Daniele da Volterra, from c. 1543-1547.

Reflect

A mighty man of God, who has clashed with the evil powers in his community and comes out proving the power of God, collapses in despair under the one spot of shade he can find in the desert beyond the battlefield. Only a day earlier, this zealous prophet on a mission from God had called down fire from heaven. Just one day prior, Elijah had prayed confidently: “O Lord, God of Abraham, Isaac, and Jacob, prove today that you are God in Israel and that I am your servant. Prove that I have done all this at your command. O Lord, answer me! Answer me so these people will know that you, O Lord, are God and that you have brought them back to yourself.” (1 Kings 18:36-37, NLT) He shouted his gutsy prayer before a huge audience. God answered boldly, and everyone was amazed.

One day later, his prayer had changed. He no longer lifts his arms with confidence. There is no strength left in his body, the audience is gone, and his prayer is simply: “I have had enough, Lord.” I’m done. I don’t have anything left. God, it’s too much. Too much. Too much. 

The Clark Sisters’ classic song comes to mind - the one that asks, “is my living in vain?” Whether it is health challenges, the struggles of ministry, the overwhelm of current events, or something else, many of us come to a point where we have little left to pray except: It’s too much, God. What is the point? I’ve given so much, and yet “the days are evil” (Eph. 5:16).  

Elijah’s prayer is still a prayer. It is still a cry to the God who has called him, the God who has fed him in the wilderness and is about to do it again. A cry of desperation is still heard by God as a summons, and God shows up. 

For Elijah, God shows up by sending an angel, who literally wakes him up to provide food and water. After another stretch of sleep, the angel (now clarified in the text as from the Lord) feeds Elijah again, but also has words for this weary servant. The angel’s words actually echo Elijah’s: “It is too much.” And these words of validation are again accompanied by the sustenance needed for what comes next. 

Whatever God has called us to, it will involve moments of glory and triumph, but alongside those moments, sometimes within a matter of hours, we will also experience desperation, exhaustion, and anxiety. The story of this mighty man of God reminds us that being a zealous and powerful servant of the Lord sometimes looks like this: running away, flopping down in the shade, and praying an honest prayer of lament to God. And, in the midst of that desperate surrender, we must be on the lookout for angels who come and attend us (see Matt. 4:11 and Psalm 91:11-12). 

It’s okay to pray, “I’ve had enough”. It’s okay to lie down in weary desperation. That just might be the best place for us to meet God and receive divine validation, sustenance, and guidance. 

Respond 

Depending on how this story hits you today, here are a few ways you might respond: 

• Go outside (maybe bring a blanket?) and lie down. Let yourself “rest in the shadow of the Almighty” (Ps. 91:1) and pray an honest prayer to El Roi, the God who sees you (Gen. 16:13). It may be as simple as Elijah’s prayer, “I’ve had enough, Lord.”

• Journal about the highs and lows for you right now. Have you been fighting hard? Where has it become too much? Where has God shown up to provide? Name it and hold it before God in prayer.

• Listen to The Clark Sisters' “Is My Living in Vain?” and sing the answer out loud: “No! Of course not! Up the road is eternal gain!”

Rest 

God who sees, in my weariness and wilderness, I lay myself down in the shade you provide. I rest in your shadow and abide in your presence. Send me an angel, Lord, to help me on my way, because this journey is just too much sometimes. Help me get up and walk with the strength you provide. Amen.

About the Author 

Kelly Johnston is a Covenant pastor currently living and serving in the western suburbs of Chicago. She loves to cook, read, create, and spend time outside - either exploring with her kids, working in the garden, or, if she’s really lucky, on a backpacking trip with her husband. She is a cancer survivor, thankful to God for every moment of life.