God’s Word, my drink in the desert

A Reflection for Monday, December 15 by Rev. Dawn Lauber 

Lectionary reading for 12/15/2025: Psalm 42; Isaiah 29:17-24; Acts 5:12-16; 

Selected passage for reflection: Psalm 42 

Read

Psalm 42 (NIV)

For the director of music. A maskil[c] of the Sons of Korah.

1 As the deer pants for streams of water,

so my soul pants for you, my God.

2 My soul thirsts for God, for the living God.

When can I go and meet with God?

3 My tears have been my food

day and night,

while people say to me all day long,

“Where is your God?”

4 These things I remember

as I pour out my soul:

how I used to go to the house of God

under the protection of the Mighty One[d]

with shouts of joy and praise

among the festive throng.

5 Why, my soul, are you downcast?

Why so disturbed within me?

Put your hope in God,

for I will yet praise him,

my Savior and my God.

6 My soul is downcast within me;

therefore I will remember you

from the land of the Jordan,

the heights of Hermon—from Mount Mizar.

7 Deep calls to deep

in the roar of your waterfalls;

all your waves and breakers

have swept over me.

8 By day the Lord directs his love,

at night his song is with me—

a prayer to the God of my life.

9 I say to God my Rock,

“Why have you forgotten me?

Why must I go about mourning,

oppressed by the enemy?”

10 My bones suffer mortal agony

as my foes taunt me,

saying to me all day long,

“Where is your God?”

11 Why, my soul, are you downcast?

Why so disturbed within me?

Put your hope in God,

for I will yet praise him,

my Savior and my God.

Reflect

There was a time in my life when I despaired. A loved one was in serious trouble. Each day felt uncertain, each hour changeable. Tears were the most consistent thing of the day. Tears were like my food, day and night. I was like that deer, aching for the presence of God. I was almost out of breath with longing to know that God was near and that I was not alone; a primal longing for the God of the universe to be close to me in my grief. I knew God was with me and with us. But that did not take away the pain; it just took away the loneliness of a painful season. 

Walking through the valley of the shadow of death, I discovered that the antidote for my tears as food was being in God's word. Scripture became my food in the desert, my drink in a drought. It both sustained and nourished me and gave me hope. I had offered hope and peace from God’s word to others before – when they were in a dark place – and here I was learning from my own words. It was true. No longer an objective truth, but a lived truth. God’s word was the balm to my soul.

I am in a theological doctoral program right now, and it reminds me of all those biblical and theological classes we all took in seminary – albeit in a new location, with new professors, readings, and a lot more of my own life experience. Here is the psalm exercise we recently had for “Old Testament and Christian Leadership” with Ellen Davis. I am sure I could try to improve on it, but here is what I thought and how I felt at the moment. It reflects some of my experience in the valley.

I wake with Your Name already on my lips.

Lord, Lord! How can that be? 

I wrestled with shadows all night long. 

No sign of you anywhere. 

Were you asleep in the corner or out for a walk?

You felt so far from me.

How long to wait in the dark –

How long to weep and wonder -

How long to wish for even a sliver of light.

Yet You, dear Lord, 

are just, merciful 

and everlasting in love. 

So I will wait for light 

to overwhelm the dark again –

And I will wait for tears to be a memory.

And while I wait, let me wake with 

Your Name already on my lips. 

Your Name already on my lips. 

Respond 

Perhaps you too are in an uncertain or despairing season. I encourage you to sit with the psalms in prayer and meditation. Let the words wash over you. You may even want to try and write your own psalm. 

Rest 

Holy and Almighty God, thank you for Your word that brings us peace and comfort and heals our very souls. We believe in You. We give thanks for You. We know that we are not alone. In Jesus’ name, Amen. 

About the Author 

Dawn Holt Lauber is a pastor, poet, singer, and songwriter. Her original sacred jazz, as well as jazz arrangements of favorite hymns, can be found at www.dawnholtlauber.com Dawn is an ordained minister with the Evangelical Covenant Church and serves as Associate Pastor of Congregational Life at Glen Ellyn Covenant Church in Illinois.